I sit here in Marin County, looking back to the city. My back rubs against the cold cobbled stone that I'm leaning against, my car parked a short distance away. A brisk wind blows in from the Pacific Ocean, accenting the cool night air. I'm not particularly comfortable, and yet I find myself lost in my own thoughts and soon forget my discomfort.
The last week has been tough. Anybody who knows me knows I'm a bit of a homebody. I like my house, my neighborhood, the normalcy of regular day to day life. Sure, I love vacations as much as anybody, but I always enjoy the return back to normal reality at the end. This being the first time I've spent any significant time away from my wife and my family, has made the whole "being away" a thousand times worse.
San Francisco is a beautiful city. The hustle/bustle of the Financial District where I've been; the thousands of shops and eateries; the people (oh, the people!); the architecture; the hills everywhere that seem to define the very city itself. Between the class I was taking, the shopping, and all the walking I have done, I have certainly tried to keep myself busy.
Tonight was my last night here. I realized that I simply had three things I must do, since who knows when I'll be back here again? And off I went, darting through the city. Finding Lombard Street and driving down the crazy twisty/turny one block section as I descended Russian Hill was exciting, if not somewhat scary (mostly getting to the top before going down). Seeing Alcatraz Island with my own eyes. And finally, seeing and crossing the Golden Gate Bridge.
It is dark. The Golden Gate Bridge is lit up beautifully, it is truly a sight to behold. And as I move my eyes away from the bridge across the bay, I see the city in all of its glory. The city seems so peaceful... the lights let you see the arcs of the hills. The skyscrapers rise from the lights all around, clearly showing their size and yet seeming to fit right into the landscape. The soft lights accent the Bay Bridge as it stretches off into the distance. I sit and admire the view, quiet in my own thoughts. I have no idea how long I've been there, but a tiny high pitched voice pulls me back.
"Say-see-naa! Say-see-naa!"
Just a short distance away, a little girl, no more than 3 or 4, is excitedly pointing at the same thing I'm seeing. Her parents are by her side, smiling and enjoying both the view and their daughter's excitement at the same time. I don't know the language they are speaking, but I don't need to know to understand. It is a family, sharing a moment together.
And it really strikes me what has been so hard about this whole week. I'm alone. In a city of hundreds of thousands, I'm really all by myself, without the people I truly love with me to share the experiences.
I feel my eyes water. I'd like to blame it on the cold wind blowing into my face.
But I know I really can't.
I'll be home soon.
Posted by Mark at September 15, 2007 12:53 AM | TrackBack